There are several things that might affect the decision of pregnancy. A woman needs to be very sure of having a baby if she is planning for pregnancy. Giving birth to a baby comes with great responsibilities. Sometimes you have an unplanned pregnancy. With an unplanned pregnancy, women decide whether to proceed with having a baby or not. Unplanned pregnancy may raise different and sometimes confusing feelings and thoughts.
When you are confused, you may feel:
- Anxious as you consider to have a baby
- Scared as you don’t know about parenting
- Happy because you always dreamed of having a baby
- Excited as this can be an opportunity for you
- Concerned if your current relationship is not stable.
Even if these feelings seem to be in conflict with each other, they are all important to work through.
Primary steps in making a pregnancy decision
Along with the feelings, there are many things to consider while making a decision, which can add to this stressful time. Few things that may help you are as follows:
- Do not hurry to decide (but do not forget that some options are influenced by how many weeks pregnant you are).
- Make yourself permissive to explore and think regarding all the options available to you.
- Be kind towards yourself- you will feel differently about your options and decide on a daily basis.
- Make sure to look at yourself physically and emotionally.
It is very important to take all your time to make the best decision for you at this point in your life.
What are the available options a woman needs to think of?
There are three available choices to consider with an unplanned pregnancy:
Abortion: A woman needs to be very careful as it is a time-sensitive decision. If a woman wants to have an abortion, she needs to decide it very quickly. The cost, location as well as availability of having an abortion change with increases in the gestation of pregnancy.
Adoption: Another option that a woman may think of is continuing with the pregnancy and placing the child for adoption. Only after the child is born, an adoption order can take place.
Parenting: Most women continue with their pregnancy and choose to be a parent even if they have an unplanned pregnancy.
Here are few things to keep in mind before making a decision
If you are pregnant and haven’t shared it with anybody, then you should do the following things:
TAKE YOUR TIME
You need to take a deep breath. When you are not expecting a pregnancy, a positive pregnancy test can be overwhelming. You may panic, but you shouldn’t. Take your time and do not make any quick decisions that you may regret later. Whatever decision you will take will have an impact on your future. Take a few days or a week to consider all the available options and what should be the best step to take. Time always allows you to make an informed decision.
You need to take your decision very calmly as it will impact your future, and you need to be a responsible woman as you will become a parent.
RECEIVE CONFIRMATION/ GET INFORMED
Most pregnancies end in miscarriage during the first seven weeks. There are chances of having a positive result because of false pregnancy. You must receive confirmation of your pregnancy.
Most women prefer to have a pregnancy test in the clinic to get a clear result of pregnancy. If a woman wants to terminate her pregnancy, most states allow abortion procedures up to 20 weeks.
SHARE THE NEWS
If you have confirmed the pregnancy, you should share it with your family and friends. When you share this news with your friends and family, they may react differently, some supportive, others negative, maybe even judgemental, but they provide you valuable support and advice. If a person has gone through the same, she can advise according to her experience. As this time is crucial, you need the support of your family and shouldn’t be alone during this period.
PREPARE YOURSELF FOR REACTIONS
You need to understand that people may not respond to the news the way you had expected. There is the possibility that they will pressure you to decide on abortion, adoption, or parenting. If they try to pressure you, then you should remind them that you need their support on these important days.
Whatever decision you choose to abort, adopt, or be a parent, you must seek appropriate resources. The very first thing you need to do is consulting a gynaecologist. Your most significant resource is information. If you decide to abort, then you will need financial support as abortion is very expensive. And also, you should be in constant contact with a medical professional before and after the abortion. If you want to choose the option of adoption, you should know about all the options and all the processes related to adoption. And finally, if you decide to give birth to your baby and become a parent, you must know very well about parenting.
Is the choice so complex?
We always hear about the ‘burden of choice’ and how difficult it can be to make one in complex situations or when there are many options available. It would be best if you did not decide alone. Your decision should be a ‘shared decision.’ It would help if you decided with all the support of your family and friends.
For some women, the decision will be clear, but for others, it may be a difficult choice to make. Women may find a lot of factors that impact the decision in different ways. It is very important to take note of how you feel about the available options and determine your beliefs on pregnancy, parenting, and abortion to decide which is best for you.
If you find any difficulty while making a decision, you can contact a doctor or even counsellors.
If you plan to have a baby, you should consult a medical professional as you will get to know about the best time to have a baby and the necessary steps you should follow to stay healthy. You will get to know about options to keep your baby healthy during the crucial nine months.
If it is an unplanned pregnancy, then there are different options like abortion and adoption. You should consult your doctor even when you choose any of the options. Whatever option you choose, you are required to know about all the relevant information. You need to know about the whole process, and you should be very careful of yourself.
If you decide to be a parent, then you should know about parenting. Raising a happy/healthy child is one of the most arduous jobs a parent can have therefore parents should have all the parenting skills before giving birth to a baby.
Antara Chowdhury is a Content Marketer and Strategist with 6 years of experience. She is Master degree holder in Journalism and wants to explore everything she can write on.